Soft-Souls
by ExpensiveImagination
Summary: In a world where people have physical representations of their souls, everyone is looking for their perfect, mirrored match. Except Danny Castellano.


The whole 'soulmates' thing is... Well, it's weird.

And it's weird, because a soul matching a soul- that invisible shape inside your chest, and that fog inside your mind matching someone else's- well... It's just...

That's not love. That's geometry.

The romantic comedies don't usually talk about that, though. All of the nasty pieces of yourself; the loud, angry, sharp edges, they come out through romanticized banter, and the rest is a happy ending.

No one ever talks about how your soul changes. No one ever teaches children that along with getting taller, their soul will grow longer sometimes, too. Change colour. Grow blacker and heavier, weighed down with sadness and anger and bitterness that all warps what once was.

It makes sense, really, Danny supposes. The warped, bitter people are paired with just that: the warped and bitter. Their souls match, and so that must mean something, right?

It's just- No one ever tells their children, goddamnit, that soul correlation isn't love.

All anyone really wants is connection, and there's a physical part of humans- of him- that's just screaming to fit alongside someone else, and to find a mirror: to not feel so alone. There's a stupid, reckless circle inside him that's longing for something he can't even place.

He shaves his chin in the mirror. Tries not to think about what other poor schmuck has the same sort of soul as him.

Because they must have been through a lot.

* * *

The problem, Mindy comes to realize, is that soul mates are kind of hard to place.

It's not- it's not that instant touch and feel and see thing that the movies mention over and over. Love at first sight isn't actually how it works, a lot of the time.

Because soulmates are messy, and souls bare themselves when they want to: when they like what they see, and when there's a mirrored image. It's like life is one big test for this thing inside her chest, and she just can't get a passing grade.

Until Casey.

* * *

Christina's soul was blue. Almost clear, in fact, the blue a reflection of his own.

They were a good pair, he thought. But then the edges around her soul crispened up, almost like they'd been heated and burnt, and had yellowed because of it, and she told him that she'd met someone new, someone with a bright yellow soul; and someone that was just... Lighter than him.

He could've swore he felt the edges of his soul flake off, falling around his ribs as their marriage did the same: fell apart.

After that, he meets Mindy.

* * *

Casey's soul looks just like hers.

Ok, well, it's not- it's not just like hers, but it's got enough of the markers, she begins to see, that this could be it.

And then it hits her: this could be it, something jumping inside of her at the thought, and she says yes to going to Haiti with him.

Mindy's soul is light, light yellow.

Or so she tells him.

(You've got to be close to someone to see their soul, and they're not close. Not even slightly friends.)

Casey proposes to her, half-way up a tree, his pale green soul thumping at her, and so she says yes, her yellow soul doing the exact same.

She takes his hand, putting her fingers on his pulse so she can see it, really see it, and it's beautiful. It's a flash of brightness, and it makes her happy, so, so happy. He does the same, and it's like the colours blend into each other behind their eyes, and she kisses him then, hand heavy with a ring, and eyes blinded by love.

Danny's right though, because souls, as he grumbles about almost twelve hours a day five days a week at work, change.

Casey's soul changes, him coming back from Haiti later than her, and with different plans to her, and yeah, ok, it make her a little annoyed, which causes a little bit of red to leak onto the sides of her soul. So what?

And then Casey drops her hand, because her soul's gotten... So much darker.

He breaks up with her, because she refuses to follow him to where he wants to be a DJ. She'd watched him do that set at the festival, and she'd felt it then, too. Change affecting her internally, like a spill on a tablecloth that won't come out, no matter how hard you wash it, or pretend that you didn't feel what you just did.

Casey won't settle down, and Mindy resents him for it.

They break-up, and within a week, Mindy's soul is a dark, deep red.

She's never hated herself more.

* * *

"So you and Casey, huh."

He doesn't pose it as a question, not really, slipping inside of her office and closing the door like they have that kind of relationship now.

And maybe, after those letters in Haiti, they do.

"Yeah," she tries to chirp. "Casey and I are broken up." And now my soul is dead, she thinks but doesn't say.

"You'll grow through it," is all he says in reply, standing there like he doesn't know how to leave after that... But he doesn't have anything left to say, either.

She smiles then, suddenly stupidly fond of him. "Thanks Danny," she says, really meaning it, and as she stands to escort him out of the office, he has this goofy sort of look on his face, looking intently at her face.

"Yeah... Yeah... No problem, Min."

She shuts the door on him, and he stands there, flummoxed.

He just saw Mindy's soul, a coloured edge around her cheeks, and it was a strong, beautiful red.

The colour of her soul, yeah, but also her heart, he's instantly sure.

* * *

At the Christmas Party, Danny does something dumb.

He's had a bit too much of that wine from her bra, and feeling reckless because its dark, and there's a halo of red around her head, he kisses her.

She's on the floor, waiting to see his dance, but he just- forgets about it, leaning down to kiss her, instead.

"Woah," she says, pulling away. "Woah, woah, woah."

The red seems a little sickly now.

"I-" he can't find his words, and his hands are shaking a little bit, he realizes.

"You kissed me," she says, her head jerked back away from him, her soul seeming more out of reach than ever.

"I- I did." He swallows hard.

Her eyes flick up and down his face. Aaliyah plays in the background, telling him to try, try again.

She's about to ask him why, he can tell, he can just tell, because apparently the idea is so unbelievable to her, and god, god, she must not be able to see his soul like he can- or maybe she can, and she's repulsed by it- so he makes a move before she can speak.

"I'm drunk," he says, "I gotta go home, I'm sorry, this was-" he waves a hand at her, and tries not to look as terrible as he feels.

He tries to say sorry, but he can't get the words out.

"Danny-"

He walks out and shuts the door.

Mindy touches her lips, and thinks about what she'd seen when he kissed her. Her eyes were open, so she saw his skin up close, and his hair, and all of those aspects of him she's never been so close to-

But she saw something else, too. Something blue around the edges, and something red, too, seeping in at the sides.

She closes her eyes, fingers reaching for her pulse (her heart's beating faster than normal, and Danny was the one who took her wine).

Red, her soul is still that incredibly strong red. But she saw something when he kissed her.

* * *

On Saturday, he turns up at her apartment to apologize.

"Danny," she says, surprised and still in her pyjamas. She pushes her glasses back up her nose, and looks at the blue that's shadowing his figure. She didn't imagine it last night, because that's his soul right there, cautiously showing itself off for her.

"You know, I forgot to give you your secret santa present."

"Oh," she says, and that's... Not what she expected. "Ok, well-"

"Great," he says, barrelling in past her, and plugging his ipod into her dock.

He's standing there, in her living room, and Try Again is blaring louder than it was last night, and it's then when she's looking him in the eyes, that he starts dancing.

"Whattt," she breathes out under her breath, because this is Danny; stick in the mud Danny, and then he's in front of her, gently dusting under her chin with his hand, before backing up and saying that he's sorry, and that this was stupid, and that-

"I loved it."

He blinks at her, and the blue glows a little brighter. "What?"

"I loved it," she says again, stepping closer.

"...Thank-you," he says, like he's confused that she could have a positive reaction to that.

"No," she tels him. "Thank-you."

And then she kisses him, and the world goes... Purple.

The world goes purple, actually, and that's how you find your soul-mate, Mindy realizes. You're not supposed to be looking for a perfect match or mirror, but just someone that will change for you. Change with you.

"Damn," she says. "Those are two cute coloured souls right there, Danny. You are welcome."

His eyebrows furrow. "I'm welome?"

"Yeah, Danny, you're super welcome that I turned your boring old-"

(It's kind of hard to lord things over his head when he's busy kissing her.)


End file.
